July 20, 2009

  • Weird weekend

    This was the first weekend since I moved here that I was all alone in the house - Patrick went home to see his parents and I had to stay as they have a dog and besides you are not allowed to take dogs on trains here. It was an interesting experience being here alone as I have almost forgotten what it felt like. After Desmond died I was in the house a lot on my own and I can't say I ever got used to it. It was mostly the knowlege that I was the only human in the house at night, something which always made me uncomfortable. I had a fairly busy weekend all in all but the nights I was alone and it felt a bit uncomfortable on the first night in particular.

    Saturday was fun. Two gal pals and me took part in our first car boot sale. We had a load of 'junk' we wanted to clear so we put it all into a car and went to a market site to try and offload it all. It turned out to be quite a laugh and we made some money, so that was great. The market closed at 12 so we then went into St George's Market in Belfast city centre. The market there is brilliant. They have a general market on Friday and on Saturday it is a food and arts market. Most of the food is hand made and simply delicious, there are lots of organic goodies and a few stall selling really good fish. I mainly go to buy the fish and as I am trying to sort my health out havng a few good portions of fisjh in the fridge each week encourages me to eat very well indeed.

    Sunday I went back into Belfast for the 'Black Market' which is an arts and craft market held indoor at a music venue here called the Black Box. I have been meaning to go for months now and so I took the absence of Patrick as a reason to get on my bike and cycle in. The market itself was a little disappointing; the majority of the stalls didn't really have much of interest for me. There was one stall though that caught my eye and this was because many of the items for sale had been on our stall the day before!! I don't think the guy remembered me but I had a little laugh all the same.

    I went to the dentist today to see if there is a dental reason for all this pain but the good news is that my teeth are fine, so it can't be that. I have stepped up my efforts to reduce my blood pressure without the use of prescription drugs and having done a bit of research online I have started taking food supplements of calcium, potassium, magnesium, garlic, coQ10 and Omega 3 tablets. In addition to all of that I am drinking organic, uncooked beetroot juice!! Yes, it seems that the answer is beetroot! Check out this link for more information. I'm having my BP checked on Wednesday so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Comments (8)

  • I will be checking out the beet root juice. I am a huge fan of carrot juice. I admit that even after all these years of being on and off alone, some nights cause me to wake with a start. It is true. Gal pals, shopping and eating, these are the very thing that makes life good!

  • Thanks for your message!

    Although there are times when I crave time alone, but the novelty soon wears off when it's long term. It reminds me too much of my long years of singledom. I was terribly lonely sometimes in those days. I could have done with Drew here over the last week or so, particularly this past weekend when I was struggling so much with the new job. But he's in the right place, being with his Mum when she's so vulnerable so soon after his father's death and I would never step in the way of that. But I know that when I'm next to him in bed and he holds me, I feel the stress seep away - corny but true. I'm looking forward to that.

    I had a much better day today. I was dreading going in, but having slept badly (constantly waking up, filled with trepidation) when I actually got up I felt strangely resigned and calm. Listening to the podcast from Richard Herring and Andrew Collins on the way to work took my mind of it so by the time I got there I was fairly chilled. And it was a much better day for me. Somehow being there for the full shift, with the handover from the night team, and then just getting on with things. made it better. I was able to do some things on my on and able to talk to some of the patients in the quiet times. The day went incredibly quickly and I have come home feeling much happier.

    I know this is the right thing for me to do, but everyone else seems to have more confidence in me than I do! Perhaps I need to examine my self-esteem closely.

  • I would love to visit all those markets, they sound wonderful. I like being alone sometimes. You sure sound like you eat healthily!

  • I have a problem now when some one sleeps here ! I wake up when ever they move Even so I can't say I like being alone at night though after 8 years I'm more used to it now. I will remember Desmond when I'm in Lourdes as I will Frank whose 8th anniversary is July the 27th ( I'm there then ) I can't believe that I've " known " you for four years- the time has passed by so quickly in retrospect ! My GS is going to Belfast on Friday to work at the Burger King at the airport. He has worked for BK since he was in the 6th form and carried on now when he's at university. He has trained up as a manager so will take over at Belfast for part of the holiday period. Sadly it seem he won't get many chances to see the city as the airport is so far from it   Marie

  • @holeinyoursoul - I think it's always easier for others to see our best qualities. I am sure that once you have a day or two under your belt you'll be great. What you are doing is so much better for you, your soul and the rest of us than the job you had before - I did the same thing when I was in my late twenties when I left retail, went to university and then started teaching. You'll be grand! :)

  • @Orlando - I try to eat healthily MOST of the time but when I go off the rails I go off big time!! :)

  • @MSB - I've really valued your friendship all this time Marie and I think about you and your loss at this time of year as well as my own. I hope you have a lovely time in Lourdes (see I spelt it correctly this time!) and that you can have plenty of laughs in the evening but also some time for reflection. x

  • @queenie - I swear that the beetroot is working! I won't know till tomorrow of course but fingers crossed eh?! :)

Comments are closed.

Post a Comment