When there's a full moon are you more restless, finding it difficult to sleep well? If you answered yes, you're not alone. But it's just not true.

Even though popular belief has long held that a full moon interferes with a good night's sleep, Austrian scientists have shown that sleep patterns are not affected by the phases of the moon.

In fact, just 8 percent of those surveyed had problems sleeping while there was a full moon, compared to 25 percent who said they had a particularly good night's sleep on the night of a full moon. Good night, moon.

Reuters reports that researchers with the Austrian Society for Sleep Medicine & Sleep Research examined the sleep patterns of 391 people in several European countries. About half the subjects had sleeping disorders, but no one knew the researchers were interested in the effect of the moon. "When I deal with patients with sleep problems, so many say that the full moon stopped them (from) sleeping, that even I was expecting some small difference to show up in the study," Gerhardt Kloesch, the Vienna University psychologist who led the current research, told Reuters.

Each morning when they woke up, the participants wrote in a diary an assessment of the previous night's sleep, including quality of slumber and the length of time they slept. They were also equipped with movement detectors so the researchers could independently measure whether their sleep was restless or peaceful.

Although more data must be analyzed before firm conclusions can be made, Kloesch told Reuters he thinks those who enjoy a siesta may have an advantage when it comes to quality sleep time. "The Spanish subjects did appear to get to sleep more quickly and achieve higher sleep efficiency--sleeping time in terms of time spent in bed--than the Austrians and the Germans," Kloesch said.

This is all very well and may be true but I slept maybe three hours last night and spent the rest of the night tossing and turning in bed! I gave up around 5.00am and got up and read my book. The moon was full and so bright you could easily have read by it. I genuinely believe the moon affects my sleep patterns and my moods too. I can't imagine that it wouldn't have an influence on us; if it can impact on the planet's tidal flows how can it not impact on the water in our brains and bodies?

I'm sitting here with the weblog editor open and cannot think of a single thing to say. I have meant to blog before now but each time I'm just blank. It makes me sad to think that this blog might be slowly dying along with so many other people's blogs that I used to read. I keep blaming Facebook but there must be more to it than that surely?

I look back at past entries I have made and see that I regularly just blogged about stuff I was doing but I just can't bring myself to write down what's going on around me now - not because there's anything bad happening, just that it seems too ordinary and every day that it no longer feels like it's a story worth telling.  

Life is pretty much grand at the moment. I'm happy enough in my relationship with Patrick, I could do with some friends in Belfast that feel more mine than his or 'ours' but that's not something I can do much about right now. I'm earning enough money to pay my bills and not too bothered about making that much more if I'm honest. I like what I do; teaching and giving therapies but I'm not interested in chasing promotion or opening up my own massage premises just yet. I would like a holiday for sure but I'm not able to just head off on my own leaving Fintan and Patrick to look after themselves!

I sound like I'm depressed, but I really don't feel that way. Maybe a little bored but not depressed.

Something important is happening on Tuesday morning which may lift the boredom but it's not guaranteed - I'll blog about that more when I'm able to.

I should update on my family I guess; if for no other reason that I might look at this entry a year or so from now and wonder why I didn't.

You might remember that in late 2005 my dad almost died when my mom, dad and I were on holiday in Gran Canaria? We had all kinds of traumas around the insurance company refusing to help us and mediccal bills mounting up at a shocking speed, he had to be put into a 'coma' for almost a week but pulled through and eventually returned home. Well, dad's still with us! He and my mom and an aunt moved to Wales about four weeks ago and this time they all plan to stay for good this time. I'm very happy about this as the air is cleaner, the people friendlier and the countryside around them is beautiful. He has to take oxygen most days due to his condition (COPD) but every time I see him or even just talk to him on the telephone I am reminded how lucky we all are that he made it through that ordeal and he is hopefully going to be with us for many more years.

My mom is okay, I often get the feeling that she takes great pleasure in the way I live my life - doing things that she would love to do but cannot. She adores Patrick and loves the life I have here; she likes the theatre for example but doesn't get the chance to go very often. She's been to visit us twice now and I know that the chance to spread her wings a little and not being in my dad's shadow is good for her soul.

My sister and her two eldest children continue to worry me. Her eldest daughter was raped as I may have said before and she is still dealing with that and of course my nephew is recovering still from the awful brain injuries that happened late last year. My sister had two children very young with an unsuitable man and then had another two with a similarliy unsuitable man when she was in her late 30's. She seems to just walk into these situations and I fear that she is never going to be free of the situations she has created for herself. I wouldn't mind but she is so unhappy and that breaks my heart as there is very little that I can do to help her. Don't get me wrong, she loves her children very ,uch and no mother could do better for her kids than she; I just wish that she had time for herself in all of this - she went from child to adult so quickly and I wonder if she'll ever have time to sit back and just be herself.

Still, all things considered everyone is okay - could be better perhaps - but they are all ok.

It's funny but I never really talk about my two brothers in all of this. I am the eldest child of four but I was always closer to my sister and having left home as soon as I could to start my own life I guess I've just drifted apart from my brothers. If I hadn't gone back to Birmingham when I did and if I hadn't done things like employing my sister in the cafe I guess I might not even be that close to her now. We're just not that 'tight' a family I guess... or perhaps it's just me who isn't close to the rest of my siblings. 

I've spent the last six weeks teaching on a summer school program at the college I work in part time. It's been a wonderful experience as it's reminded me of just why I enjoy teaching so much. I have had two groups, one Pre Intermediate and the other Upper Intermediate. Both groups have been a joy to teach and great fun to be with too. Sadly all good things come to an end and I saw the Pre Int. group today for the last time and I'll be saying farewell to the other group on Friday. The best thing about the experience is teaching a multi-lingual group of people of all ages and backgrounds; I have two Catholic nuns from Sri Lanka in one group sitting next to, and getting on very well, a Muslim woman from Iran! It's been so refreshing to work with people who are motivated and willing to take part in their own learning process - you would assume that as the courses are not free that you could guarantee that students would be motivated, but not so!

I'm really going to miss them all but what fun it has been!

Once this is all over I have about two weeks before I start back at the college on the standard teaching program. I am thrilled that the College has offered me more classes this year than last. It seems I'm being rewarded for my work with an especially difficult mixed ability group last teaching year - but then you know that already having moaned about them previously!! I've been offered classes at a much higher level than previously and this is wonderful but also a little bit scary as there is a very real chance that the people I am teaching will have a much better knowledge of English grammar than I have!

Still, I'm going into the new academic year with something interesting ahead of me.

It's been a very tiring weekend as it's been Pride weekend here! Apart from the now annual pilgrimage to Gran Canaria I rarely go out to pubs and clubs and I never really drink at home so two nights in a row drinking in clubs has left me feeling rather wasted.

We (Patrick, my ex who came over for the event and I) went down on Saturday to see the parade. It was very good natured and there seemed to be as many straight people there as gay. The usual demonstrations from the Christian Right Wing were generally ignored - some straight people in town for shopping but who stayed to watch the fun were the people most likely to react to the bigots; there was very much a feeling of 'not in my name'.

We didn't stop out much after the parade passed by - my days of drinking and dancing in the park after Pride are very much over!!

Below is a link to a BBC news video clip which captures some of the fun of the day.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-northern-ireland-10826701

I went home to Birmingham on Tuesday morning at the crack of dawn (cheapest flight) and found it much the same as I left it. I had to wander around the town centre for about four hours till I could get into my cheap but always cheerful ETAP hotel room. It's funny going back to the city that I ended up spending so much of my life in, I felt 'at home' of course but also very much the tourist. It was nice to spend time just sitting and watching people rushing to work and also thinking back to when I was one of those people.

Though I was home to go and spend some time at Desmond's resting place I had decided before coming that it wasn't going to be about sadness at the loss of him. Instead I would spend time with people who knew and loved him. Sadly none of Desmond's family wanted to see me but there were plenty of other people; 'our family' and I guess that they are the ones who ultimately count.

In the evening I went down to Hurst Street (B'ham's gay quarter) and met two friends for (lots) of drink and a little dinner. It was a lovely night and it was warm, we got to sit outside and just talk and talk! Desmond was never far from our conversation - this is nothing new for me it has to be said as he very much lives on in my thoughts and many daily comments to others on how he would have done/did something and tales of places been to or experiences had. Eventually we either drank enough or it got too late to drink any more and I bade them farewell until we could be together again. I went back to my hotel and went to bed - not before having a loooooong shower as I adore hotel bathrooms with towels I don't need to wash and unlimited hot water!!

Wednesday was the actual anniversary of Desmond's death and once I got up and had breakfast I walked over to the graveyard. I was upset at first to see the amount of damage to the headstones. Such a shame as many of them are (or were) Victorian and quite ornate. There wasn't a single statue with it's head intact and the larger headstones had been pushed over. I know this kind of vandalism happens everywhere but it once again confirmed that leaving England behind was the right thing to do. I also had a bit of a panic as I couldn't at first find out where I had placed Desmond's ashes but I eventually tracked them down and I was very happy to see that the rose I planted two years ago had taken. Desmond always used to tell me that his beloved aunt used to say that if a rose grows in the garden then there will be love in the house. I also planted some tulips as they were another favourite plant of his and they would remind both of us of several trips we took to Amsterdam over twenty years ago now. I sat down with him and spent a while just chatting to him and letting him know what's been going on. I had this idea that although I speak to him every day maybe he could only hear me when I was sitting next to him - he was famously deaf in one ear! Well, it was just lovely sitting there. I told him how much I loved him and how much I missed him still, I got to tell him how I was living in Northern Ireland now and how I had met Patrick and that he was a lovely patient soul who put up with me for some strange reason!

Eventually it was time to go, I felt I had said all I could and probably nothing much new if there is any way that the departed can still hear us. It was hard walking away - more difficult than the first time I left him there and I shed a few tears as I did so but that's okay.

Later in the afternoon I went to see my sister and mynephews and nieces in Wolverhampton. Chris my nephew is doing very well after all the brain surgeries and the traumas around that. He has a long way to go yet of course but hopefully he will continue to improve and will be able to live independantly one day. My niece on the other hand hasn't begun to recover from the multiple rape she endured and the resulting criminal trial which was sadly delayed and delayed and now may never take place. I'm not suggesring that she should have recovered btw, I only meant to say that she is still very much affected by the ordeal and it is sad to see that she is living a shadow of her previous life. All in all it was sad to visit the house with so much sadness there but I love the occupants so much that of course I would not even consider missing a chance to see them all.

That evening I had dinner with a close and mutual friend of Desmond's and his new partner. We had a lovely time and it was nice to catch up and, of course, share a few more tales of Desmond. I returned to my hotel and packed my bag before heading for the bathroom and then bed.

My last day was always going to be a bit of a puzzle - I was on the last flight home that day (cheapest) and of course everyone I knew in Birmingham would be working so I decided that a day trip into Mid Wales was the best way to spend the time. This was for two reasons really; I got to see once again a part of the world that Desmond and I loved so much and also my parents moved there just four days before I flew over to England. I took a six hour return journey for a four hour surprise visit but it was so worth it! It was lovely to see where my parents and my aunt are living and I think they have found an excellent house; near the sea and with a view of hills and green fields.

I had enough time to chat with them and to catch up and also enough time to stand on the local beach, which coincidentally Desmond and I stood on during our last trip before he got ill, and look out to sea - towards the island where my new life now is and with my back to the island that has more memories than I could ever hope to share with anyone. It was wonderful to be there with Desmond so present for the last few days and now it was time to turn away and head home.

I've been working all this week at the college doing summer school and it's been wonderful! This last teaching year I had just the one class that I saw once a week for two hours and I realised too late of course that it was the class that none of the other tutors wanted to do. I'm sure I've blogged about it over the last few months as it was at times a real pain!

Teaching summer school has re-awakened my interest in teaching as I have been given two groups of motivated students with a good sense of fun as well as an interest in learning. I have found myself genuinely looking forward to getting into the classroom each morning again.

I'm also really pleased because it would appear that all my struggles in the first year with the college has paid off and I have been offered some decent classes in the main college buislding this coming teaching year! I'm going to be teaching an Advanced group and a Proficiency class too. I'm very happy with this as I am likely to have motivated people once again.

I love teaching and I am so glad that it 'found' me when it did as it helped me very much to be the person I am today. I certainly hope to continue with it as a part time career at least.

July 20th I fly back to Birmingham for two nights. I don't especially want to go back to be honest but the 21st is the anniversary of Desmond's death and I want to go to where I left his ashes and check that all is well and I guess I want to be close to where he rests on the anniversary oif the day I lost him. I want to sit down and just have a good old chat! I miss him terribly, I thank the gods that I have a wonderful partner in Patrick - he never seems to get bored with me talking about D. I'm lucky that I also have a couple of good friends who knew D and who also allow me to talk about him.

Wouldn't it be AWFUL if I couldn't???

Going back to Birmingham is going to be even stranger this time compared to last year. My parents are in the process of packing up to move back to Wales and they will be gone by the time I get there. I'm going to stay in a hotel in the city centre and try to catch up with a few people I know who still live there. Sadly only one or two of them can be really counted as 'friends' but it will be nice to see a few people if possible; otherwise I shall be sitting in a hotel room with nothing much to do!

At the end of last month (June) Patrick and I flew to Manchester for a birthday party and met up with my ex; Conor and a few other people we knew. It was a fun weekend as we got to help a dear friend of mine celebrate his 50th year and also have a few drinks and let our (shaven) hair down! A far cry from my up coming trip I fear but I'm guessing any change is as good as a rest.

Mentioning surprises in my last blog about my birthday reminded me that I mentioned some time ago that I was doing something that was going to be a great surprise for Patrick and several other people and that I wouldn't be able to talk about it here in case he read my blog. I'm almost there but still cannot tell what it is! Not long now though.

June 13th and my 44th year on this wonderful planet! I wasn't going to do anything but in the end couldn't resist having people round and cooking for them! Come the day it was a bit rainy and cold but I had at that point spent three days cooking and baking and I wasn't going to let the weather get me down!

I made about five loaves of bread; tomato and herb, chilli, sesame & sunflower and good old rye with pumpkin seeds. I also made two massive pots of hot food - tofu curry and lentil chilli; Patrick thought that there was a chance I'd be left with the two pots of food uneaten but there was barely enough left to have for dinner later in the week! Along with that I made a few types of humous, some guacamole, a raitha and a fiercely 'garlicky' garlic sauce - all low fat, though you'd never know it I also made some veggie samosas and some cheese and onion rolls and, and, and... I lost track of what else I made to be honest!!

The food was devoured by a good group of friends who showed up - actors are ALWAYS hungry I have discovered, and half the acting fraternity of Belfast were round my house!

Despite asking people not to bring gifts I got a few nice things but I am beginning to see that my birthday is more about me giving thanks for my life, still being here, having some great friends and for still surprising myself!

Midsummer's evening and we have been having a veritable heatwave the last few days.

The weekend was especially nice and a lot of it was spent in our local park - The Ormeau Park. It is a typically Victorian park, beautifully laid out with a wide variety of plants and many different areas for people to either walk the dog, play sports, read a book etc.

From Wikipedia: The land for Ormeau Park was formerly part of the Donegall family estate. It became their home in 1807, when the family moved to Ormeau Cottage from their town house in Donegall Place. The building was extended by George Chichester, 2nd Marquess of Donegall, who lived there until his death in 1844. Eventually the family was forced to sell the estate to pay its spiralling debt. In 1869, the area was purchased by Belfast Corporation and it was opened as a park to the public in 1871. The opening of Belfast's first public park was marked with a parade from Carlisle Circus through Belfast which attracted a large crowd and finished with speeches in the park.

The park was designed by Timothy Hevey, a successful young architect of the day. He won a competition for the best design for 100 acres (0.40 km²) of parkland. The present-day park still roughly follows his design with several alterations. Some of the land is home to the 9-hole course of Ormeau Golf Club, and other nearby land near Ravenhill was laid out in playing fields. The embankment road cut off the river frontage of the park in the 1920s.

What I love most are the trees, there are so many of them! In addition to the quantity is the variety, there are so many different species of trees in the one place and having walked Fintan through this park from Autumn last year to Summer now I know that at any one time there is always something to see and enjoy.

Aren't trees amazing things? How often do you stop and look at them?